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Humor Corner [4]


The Lighter Side of the Mission
500kc

Everyone knows the mission wasn't all serious business. There were times when you saw, said, or did something that just made you laugh!

This is place to let us all know about it. If you have an experience, story, cartoon, or joke that made you laugh, send it in and I'll put it here.


Kenneth Anderson
Posted 4/19/04

While serving in a threesome, my companions and I were out tracting late in the evening, and decided to take a short break. We sat down on a bench in an area enclosed by paneláks where about twenty or so kids, ages from about 10 to 16 were outside playing.

As we sat we talked amongst ourselves in English until one young slightly pudgy girl stopped and asked us if we were Americans. One of my companions (whom I won't name to protect the innocent or guilty as the case may be)started talking to her asking her if she spoke English. She said yes. My companion then asked, "What is your name?" After a short pause while the girl translated the phrase in her head, she replied with her name. "How old are you?" Again, a pause before responding correctly.

By now, all the kids in the area had stopped to crowd around the Americans and listen to the exchange. My companion, wanting to have a little fun at this girl's expense, then asked her, "So, have you been chunky all your life?" While the girl look confused at us, obviously not understanding, we heard hysterical laughter breaking out from the back of the crowd. The crowd parted to reveal a young boy about 16-ish laughing his head off.

My companion embarrassed, asked him, "Do you speak English?" to which the boy answered in perfect English, "You bet!" It turns out that the boy had lived in the U.S. for two years and spoke without an accent. I'll bet he was the only one in the city who would have understood the word "chunky" in that context.

Moral: Elders/Sisters, be careful what you say: You never know who is listening!
Mike Glauser
Posted 12/21/03

My name is Mike Glauser, and I just returned two weeks ago. Anyways, last winter when I was serving in Brno, my companion and I were waiting at the nadrazi for our tram. I looked across the tracks and saw a guy and a girl making out. I asked my companion (in Czech), "What are they doing?" He tried to say, "libaji se," but he actually said, "libi." I replied by saying that I didn't ask him if he liked that (libi), but what they were doing. I guess that "to se mu libilo!"


Steve Danielson

First of all you have to know, that Elder Peter Christensen got me saying a Spanish phrase over and over. This phrase - tu cabeza es muy grande - means "Your head is very big." I would say it a lot. Elder Jason Moss started saying it too while I was with him. Well, Elder Moss and I were tracting in Martin and met the "drunk linguist." He said he was fluent in several languages. I said, "So, we can just speak English then, right?" He said, "Umm..Thank you."

He wouldn't let us leave so we made the excuse that we had to catch the bus (but we were just going to keep tracting). Then he followed us out so we had to go to the bus. Elder Moss then asked if he understood Spanish. He said yes (yeah, like he understood English). Elder Moss meant to say the above Spanish phrase. Instead it came out "Tvoja hlava je velmi grande." The man thought for a minute and said, "Hmm...co znamena grande?" Thinking quickly, Elder Moss said, "Umm...Krasna?" The man said, "Hmm...Thank you." We laughed the rest of the day.
I'll start off with a joke I heard in Slovakia. Forgive the translation.

There was a big computer/electronics conference in Prague and everyone was sending their reps. Even from Bratislava, AT&T sent 3 reps and IBM sent 3 reps. After the AT&T reps bought their train tickets, they saw the three IBM reps and noticed that they only bought 1 ticket for the 3 of them. They went up to them and began to make fun of them: "I guess you guys forgot how to count, huh?" "Don't worry about us," they said. "We'll be fine."
Well, the train left Bratislava and soon the conductor was on his way to check tickets. As he neared their compartment, the IBM guys all went and squished into the bathroom. When the conductor knocked on their door and said, "Ticket please!" one hand reached out with one ticket. The conductor stamped it and left. The AT&T reps were very impressed!
The conference went well and that night they were in the Prague station buying tickets home. Having gotten a bright idea from the IBM reps, the AT&T reps now only bought 1 ticket for the three of them. They now noticed that the IBM reps hadn't bought a single ticket. "Now this we've got to see" the AT&T reps thought to themselves. The train started back to Bratislava and the conductor started making his way down the train again. This time the three AT&T guys crammed together in the bathroom. Now, the three IBM guys came up to the door, knocked and said, "Tickets please!"
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